Saturday, March 8, 2014

His first time

I brought the bf back to my kampung last January *gasp* It was actually for my grandmother's after burial ceremony. It is one of Iban tradition and as a sign of respect to the deceased. My paternal grandmother passed away on January (3 days before my birthday). After the funeral, we mourned for her for 2 weeks, the standard mourning process normally is one month but we had to cut it short to two weeks because both of my aunts are married to Chinese, so they need to celebrate Chinese New Year. 

2 weeks after the mourning period, we had this ceremony to indicate the end of mourning (ngetas ulit) Please don't quote me on this because I myself not so sure about Iban tradition. I'm not the kind that follow tradition unless it is a must (mostly because my parents said so)

Back to this ngetas ulit event, our family members and relatives would came to our long house and the event took at least 2 days 1 night. What did the people do for the whole 2 days 1 night you ask. Well, during the day, the women prepared foods and stuffs for night and the men went to cemetery to properly cement and build the tomb. Then night came and we hired some professional lady to cry recite Iban poem (?) It's more like crying on behalf of the family and wishing grandma happy wherever she was reunited with her late husband and parents at the other side of the world.

So, the bf went back to kampung with me for the weekend. It's kind of a big thing for me because it's means introducing him to my extended relatives. Actually my dad is more excited for him to meet other relatives. Last year he was anticipating the bf to be back for Gawai for us, wtf but the bf was still in uni back then.

Actually this was taken during our last day when waiting for express boat

I told the bf to be open minded beforehand because I was scare he couldn't accept what he's about to face. Hahahaha I made everything sound super scary to him. But I was just afraid everything is too much for him, culture/tradition/custom/lifestyle are very different in long house. Even I sometimes having hard time adjusting.

I have kids plastering themselves to me all the times, especially if you have camera with you. Everyone would want a photo.

They are very helpful and always offer help in term if manual labor.

That is one of the things that I like about long house. The community are very helpful whenever there's occasion/ceremony/festival. So you are not alone as everyone is eager to help. Surprisingly, the bf adapted very well to his new surrounding.Apart from language barrier, everything else was smooth.

But the poor bf been having stye for a week. Hence he's refusing any photos.

Night activities include drinking, chit chatting and gambling. 

That was during the first night because the actual ceremony took place on the second night where all the relatives reached. Sadly, I took nil photos because it was a bit inappropriate to snap photos especially when they're paying their respect to my grandma.

I'm so glad the bf clicked with everyone and they seem to like him too. This was a big step for me because I'm opening up part of my world that I myself not quite familiar with to him. Like I've said, I'm not exactly a traditional kind of girl and I only gone back to my kampung once a year for less than a week.

If you're a long time reader, you would probably know that I kinda dread going back. Always whining and complaining and such a drama queen when I'm back at kampung.

And kids love him the most.

Maybe he's naturally good with kids hahaha

Selfie at the wharf while waiting for the express boat

The funny thing about going back to kampung with the bf was it is also my first time going back on my own, my family went back a day earlier. So I have no idea about the places that the express boat would stop along the way to Song. Everytime the express boat stopped, I would urged him to go out and see if we're there yet. At one time, we almost stopped at the wrong place. Lucky I asked around, otherwise....

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