Thursday, April 29, 2010

I love my parents

My parents are the most wonderful persons ever.
Of course not because they always get me what I want.
Although that is actually the major reason. : )
It's because they love me.
I'm blessed.
Even when we're miles apart, they never forget me when they are shopping.

Even my mom took the liberty to call me at freaking 9 in the morning, 
just to ask me this,
"What is your shoes size?"

That question instantly woke me up.
They were attacking Lea Center for it's half price sale.
And they included me in their shopping list.

And my dad mailed me the stuffs that they bought for me.
Told you, my parents are awesome. <3

This arrived the next day.

Tore it open and I found this.

Love this very much.

Dear mom and dad, 
thanks for loving your daughter so much,
I'll make you proud one day.

your very grateful daughter.

P/S: I got kicked out from my college.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Hey there

The last part.
Yes, that's true.

Seriously Screw

Life moving on a fast path now. 2 papers are done and I still have 5 more to go. And again I made the same mistake. Studying at the very last minute and torturing myself to stay up all night. Bad habit die hard I guess. Up until yesterday, I really couldn't take it anymore. My biological clock is seriously mess up. I did tried to sleep early last night, but heck, lying for 2 hours still I was wide awake. Woke up this morning with the throbbing headache, get up for one hour and went back to sleep. It was restless sleep I must say. Too many dreams and I slept in pain. It made me tired even more.

Tonight I'm gonna change that. I need to get my life back on track, especially the sleeping pattern. I had had enough of this student sleeping style and it cost me big time. I can't afford to get sick. I don't know why but final exam this time I don't feel as it is final exam. That should explains the lack of my enthusiasm or panic level. But I'm still hanging on here. Studying just for the sake of exam.

Seriously, I have no passion in what I'm studying right now. I means my course is fine, I like it but liking it may not be enough. This should determine my future. But heck, how many people out there actually love their job? I bet it all because of the money that they get and the security that it provides. Sometimes, you just have to do whatever it is to bring back the food for the family, whether you love your job or loathe it. As long as it provides food and shelter, you won't complain that much, right?

But I don't want my life to end up like that. I don't want waking up every morning and dreading my job. Geez, that will be suck. I still have time to decide where I want to embark for my future. I hope I make the right decision. Truth to be told, I still have no idea what I want to do. A piece of paper called degree didn't help much in determine what I want my career to be. But it sure does help to bring in the moolah.

So, which one is the best choice then? Job satisfaction with less money or no job satisfaction with more money? Count me materialistic, but for now I'll go with the latter. Money makes the world goes around, ain't it? At  least I can buy or do anything that make me happy with the money that I get.  Travelling to the other side of the world and strolling in Jimmy Choo, carrying my Hermes sound good enough to compensate the job satisfaction, right?

Sunday, April 25, 2010

When In Rome

This movie is great. A double thumbs up for this one. 
Maybe because it somehow relates to me in its own way. 
I do believe in love. 
Really, I do. It's just that I'm not sure if there's going to be someone whom can love me for who I am out there. 
What if I put my heart out there and he stomps on it?
What if he wake up one day and find that he don't love me anymore?
Well, it's just the what if question.
I shouldn't be so pessimist, right?
There's still chance for my happily ever after.

I love this. 
The moment their eyes locked on each other.
I'm sure she can feel butterfly in her stomach, weak in the knee, face flushing red and tongue-tied.
I know exactly how that feel.

I love how Nick never stop trying to show Beth his love, to get Beth to believe in love again.
He never giving up albeit all Beth had done.
Someone who loves you will never give up on you even if the world did.
That's the beauty of love.

I super love her wedding dress. 
Just simple and elegance.
It takes a lot for her to believe in love. 
Maybe I am too.

His sincerity touches me.
I think I'm falling for him.
But I'm scare to.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Again you make me smile

Don't know what's wrong with me. I can't concentrate at all today. I'm still on first page of my notes. Nothing seems right right now. It feel like I couldn't care less of this world anymore. I'm tired. Tired of what? I don't know. Tired of being me perhaps. I let procrastination takes over me without any fight. I tried to sleep but ended up laying wide awake with random thoughts in my head. Even surfing the net didn't excites me anymore. Why ah why am I like this? Have anyone come to this point in their life before? Like they feel tired of living in this world as well? Like you are falling into this dark deep hole? And when you see nothing in front of you except darkness.  No hope, no faith, it's nothing at all. I feel useless and hopeless. I'm afraid I can't live up to others expectation. Now I don't even understand why do I care that much about what others thought of me. Isn't this is my life and I can live it the way I want it to be.

Oh, it's middle of the month. The only conclusion that I can come up with is maybe I'm PMS-ing right now. It must be. This roller coaster ride of emotion is the outburst of everything that I had trying to bury. I feel like crying for no reason. But I didn't.

My life is not that depressing actually. Amidst all this emo moment, I found out that *ehem* subscribed to my Facebook status. That's enough to put a smile on my face. This time a genuine smile.  A winner smile like he claimed. Enough of this pitying myself moment, I should get up and start my revision. My study partner is waiting for me to save him. It's good to know that there's some friends whom concerns about me. Thanks all.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Sharing is Caring

I'm back at campus now. Ask me how my study week was, I'll say it's good, not good because I had study but good because I'm home. The feeling I had when my family sent me off to airport is always the same. It's the heavy feeling like something stomped at my heart. I never this emotion to my family of course. Except there was once when I was still study in Labuan, I was completely melting down and cried my eyes out telling my dad I want to quit study. Dinner that night was a disaster, my brother cried cause he fought with my cousin, my sister cried because we fought, then I cried caused I felt so down. Nobody ate anything that night. My plate of rice was soaked with my tears. People at the other table kept staring at us wondering what happened. Come to think of it, this sound like a perfect scene in a sad drama. Hahaha..who knows my life can be that dramatic. Back at the hotel, my parent consoled me, kept telling me to hang in there for two more months. Yes, I remembered that time was December because they came all the way to Miri to spend the Christmas with me. Seeing my dad holding back his tear to tell me to be strong had really touched me. The next day, they sent me off to airport, I boarded my flight with blurry vision, wiping my tears at my seat.

Up until I enrolled at Unimas, I still feel the same upon leaving home. But I didn't show it, at least not to my parent. I want them to think that their daughter had grown up. Truth is, every night before my departure, I cried myself to sleep. Well now not anymore. After 3 years of studying away from home, I'm kind of get used to this. I still feel sad but no more tears now. Kuching sort of like a second home for me. Plus, after graduating, I'm going to work away from home as well. So, I'm adapting now, very well I must say.

I have my exam this Friday, but heck, I'm far from ready. You know what I had been doing? Blog reading,  of course. There are some blogs (besides my friends's blog..hehe..) that I constantly followed for more than a year now. I'm such a loyal reader..hehe.. I couldn't help it. These people, they are going through the same stage as mine. Studying and trying to live life to the fullest. It's sort of comforting me to know that others are going through the same situations at least once in their life.

So, here I'm going to share the blogs that I'd constantly stalk:

         A Chinese girl whom currently studying in the State. She's crazy and very random. That's why I like her.

        Best friend of Suet or Suet's future sister in law as Suet always mentioned. She's really funny and short  
        too. hahaha..
        Cindy is an avid blogger. I love her blog because of her writing style. Plus, she updates it frequently.
        Her blog was featured in CLEO last two years. That's how I came across her blog and the rest is                   
        history. She's a devoted young workaholic which inspires me.
        A medical student in Makassar. To say this girl is random is an understatement. She's so funny and 
        wicked too. 

Actually there's a lot more blogs that I'd visited, but I guess these five blogs will do for now. I'll share more next time. Notice that these bloggers are all girls and majority are students? I guess that why I like their blogs, they talked about student life and clothes and music and make up, basically anything that a girl would love.
Anyway, do enjoy their blogs. In the meantime, I'll be working my ass off for my final. 

Friday, April 16, 2010

What? Study week's over already?

I haven't touch my notes yet. How could time flies this fast?
Damn, what happens to my study plan? 
Oops, I did it again. Nothing goes according to my so-called study schedule.
Nevertheless, I'm having great time at home.
So, who cares about study?
Hehe..kidding only. Study still very much my priority, well, next to having fun of course.
Got to live life to the fullest, right? 

The fact that I'm practically on cloud nine right now is all thanks to *ehem*
He made it hard for me not to blush in front of the laptop.
Quite a teaser you are, ain't it mister?

I'm officially broke now. 
Spent a little over the budget for my laptop. 
Let's hope no more problem after this, alright Lappy?