I wish it's easy

Just because I'm here for you all the time, doesn't mean that you can take me for granted. I have feelings too, and hell sure it does involves you. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's hard. I was doing good in being just friend with you until you poured your feeling out on me and take it back afterward. You suggested we take things slowly, one step at a time to sort all things out and be clear. I agreed. 3 days later, you changed your mind and obviously your feeling too. This roller-coaster emotion ride is way too much but I don't know why I still can handle it and act like I'm fine. I can see through your mind, too bad you can't spot my fake smile. I wanted to say that you're selfish for putting us on hold but I'm a fool too for letting you do so. I wish it's easy.