Seriously Screw

Life moving on a fast path now. 2 papers are done and I still have 5 more to go. And again I made the same mistake. Studying at the very last minute and torturing myself to stay up all night. Bad habit die hard I guess. Up until yesterday, I really couldn't take it anymore. My biological clock is seriously mess up. I did tried to sleep early last night, but heck, lying for 2 hours still I was wide awake. Woke up this morning with the throbbing headache, get up for one hour and went back to sleep. It was restless sleep I must say. Too many dreams and I slept in pain. It made me tired even more.

Tonight I'm gonna change that. I need to get my life back on track, especially the sleeping pattern. I had had enough of this student sleeping style and it cost me big time. I can't afford to get sick. I don't know why but final exam this time I don't feel as it is final exam. That should explains the lack of my enthusiasm or panic level. But I'm still hanging on here. Studying just for the sake of exam.

Seriously, I have no passion in what I'm studying right now. I means my course is fine, I like it but liking it may not be enough. This should determine my future. But heck, how many people out there actually love their job? I bet it all because of the money that they get and the security that it provides. Sometimes, you just have to do whatever it is to bring back the food for the family, whether you love your job or loathe it. As long as it provides food and shelter, you won't complain that much, right?

But I don't want my life to end up like that. I don't want waking up every morning and dreading my job. Geez, that will be suck. I still have time to decide where I want to embark for my future. I hope I make the right decision. Truth to be told, I still have no idea what I want to do. A piece of paper called degree didn't help much in determine what I want my career to be. But it sure does help to bring in the moolah.

So, which one is the best choice then? Job satisfaction with less money or no job satisfaction with more money? Count me materialistic, but for now I'll go with the latter. Money makes the world goes around, ain't it? At  least I can buy or do anything that make me happy with the money that I get.  Travelling to the other side of the world and strolling in Jimmy Choo, carrying my Hermes sound good enough to compensate the job satisfaction, right?